Theorist Meets God
A surreal encounter between a theorist and God, blending moon-landing conspiracy, cosmic mythology and divine exasperation into an absurd meditation on belief.
He stood before the flames of the Almighty, rubbing his chin.
“My God. There is one thing that always baffled me. If the moon landing was real, why isn’t there a Starbucks up there by now?”
The flames pulsed.
“You mortals built one lousy outpost and expected intergalactic capitalism? Fine. The truth? Man planted his flag in 1969. Then the lunar warlords declared holy war, and your distant outpost was dust.”
The man’s eyes lit up. “I knew it!”
God’s voice shook the firmament. “You’re heading to Paradise. Let. It. Go.”
The man leaned in. “So Neil and Buzz were the first humans to walk…”
And before he could finish, God vanished in a puff of divine frustration, leaving the man in purgatory.
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